Thailand

We woke up nice and early to go beat the traffic to the airport. We checked in our luggage and just lounged around. You know, we did the usual security things.


Oh yeah we got dropped off at the wrong hotel and they served us complimentary juice then it felt bad after we all found out that we weren't their customers!




The flight was a long and arduous journey. I did get two seats to myself but my legs were still feeling so cramped. I watched one movie, read a book, read a magazine and then played games with Michael on his iPhone. Carlos slept through the entire trip, quite amazing really!




We landed and an instant humid wave struck us! It felt good being in the tropics, though I was wearing a jumper and jeans. We caught a taxi over to Patong, the main hub of Phuket. We checked in, dropped off our luggage, waited for the tropical rain to die down then headed out onto the streets.


This lady man was hilarious, only because there was NO attempt of trying to make himself girly except for the drag queen make up.

One of the 3 hot lady boys

We caught a tuk tuk over to Bangla Road, grabbed a quick bite at Burger King then we hit the strippers. Actually, we associated ourselves with this funny as Thai guy that kept laughing at Carlos' eagerness for lady boys. So we went on a hunt for lady boys. The entire night Bas (that was the Thai guy) kept mocking Carlos as a lover of lady boys.

She made me touch his/her boob and it was so awkward. But I've always wanted to feel what fake feels like so eventually I took the opportunity, they really do feel fake hey?

ASHAMED


But then again, who could blame him if he was? Some of the lady boys ACTUALLY looked like Asian supermodels. When we watched their show my mouth gaped open at how gorgeous some of them were. We only got photos with one of the pretty ones, but I swear the other two were stunning!



I can't believe Carlos tried taking a photo of her boob while he put money in it hahaha

From ugly to pretty, all the lady boys were loving Carlos. Actually even the strippers were loving Carlos. Michael and I would just slowly shove over so Carlos would be sitting alone to maximize basking in all that girl glory.
She/he forced my leg up okay...

BY THE WAY, I am not drunk. It was just the lighting. I'm on antibiotics for this terrible chesty cold.



After the lady boys, we just did a whole bunch of strippers. I found entertainment in all the seedy old men that rock up alone and think they're strutting hot stuff as naked young women flock all over them.




We got bored of the fine girls and fake boobs so we popped over to the manky side of town. The world of ping pong shows.


I can't get over how pretty he/she is!


We first saw a lady chug down a bottle of water then pass it through to another bottle as coke. Then we saw some pole dancing again. Then we saw a lesbian show, and gosh they were going pretty hard core. Like one was totally BITING like a dog on the other girl down there! Then we saw a lady smoke 3 cigarettes with her private parts while reading a magazine and sipping on coffee.




Then we saw the ping pong show. It kind of looks like a human chicken laying an egg. Hey I read this quote yesterday on the plane that I thought was funny, and I guess it fits in right now. "A hen is an egg's way of laying another egg."
Just made me think about the whole which came first, hen or an egg? I can't believe I just started that topic after talking about a lady popping out a ping pong out of her baby maker.




Carlos even got the manky trickster girls flirting with him, even like touched his face straight after they did their show... EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!





The other boys were getting tipsy, and I was getting tired. So we went home. One of the strippers started hitting on me saying I was cute and asked where I was from and I'm thinking, "Hun, I won't be taking you home lol stop flirting!"